-from the Gigglesville Daily

Still Having a bad day?

Just remember, it could be worse...

1. The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez
oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the
most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid
cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a
killer whale ate them both.

2. A psychology student in New York rented out her spare room to a
carpenter in order to nag him constantly and study his reactions.
After weeks of needling, he snapped and beat her with an axe leaving
her mentally retarded.

3. A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking
frantically with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards
the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current
she whacked him with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking
his arm in two places. Until that moment he had been happily listening
to his Walkman.

4. Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of
sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn Germany. Suddenly the pigs,
all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and
stampeded, trampling the two helpless protesters to death.

And finally...

5. Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough postage on a
letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it.
Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.

Your day's not so bad, is it...